Friday, August 17, 2012

iT'S A NEW DAY................

iT'S A GREAT MORNING, THOUGH IT'S HARDLY A DAY FOR THE BEACH. iT LOOKS LIKE RAIN IN THE SKY...SILLY WEATHER...WELL JESSE WASN'T TO HAPPY ABOUT ME SPENDING THE NITE, BUT I NEEDED SOME TIME ALONE TO THINK. AND WELL I HAVEN'T FOUND A PEACE WITH MYSELF YET...SO I'M STILL SITTING HERE AT MOMS WONDERING WHAT TO DO...i'M NOT GOING TO STRESS MYSELF TODAY...JUST NOT...GOING TO HANG WITH MOM A LITTLE BIT LONGER THEN GATHER UP MY THINGS AND GO HOME...
ISN'T THIS A PRETTY PHOTO, I DON'T OFTEN FIND DRAGON FLY PHOTOS...I WAS LOOKING FOR A NEW CHRISTMAS PHOTO A VINTAGE WOMAN ONE. I FOUND THIS LOVELY BLOG FULL OF VINTAGE PHOTOS...I HAVE TO CHECK THE NAME AGAIN. I JUST LOVE THIS ONE.
TODAY I WISH I COULD JUMP IN THE CAR AND DRIVE MYSELF ACROSS THE BAY TO MY OLDER DAUGHTER'S HOUSE...THESE ARE THE MOMENTS THAT I REALLY HATE MY PANIC DISORDER TRULY...I LOVE JESSE, DON'T GET ME WRONG, I JUST DON'T KNOW IF WE ARE REALLY RITE FOR EACH OTHER...
I HAVE MESSED UP MY DIET ALL TOGETHER, TOTALLY....A NEW DAY YES....I'M GOING TO START OVER AGAIN AND NOT LET MYSELF GO DOWN...PICKING MYSELF UP BY THE BRITCHES AND GOING FORWARD..THERE IS A BOOT CAMP GOING ON EVERY MORNING MON-FRI. 9AM -10AM...JUST DON'T KNOW IF I CAN DRIVE MYSELF THERE...IT'S A EXERCISE CLASS.
EVEN IF I DON'T DO A LOT, I NEED THE MOTIVATION...I HAVE GAINED SO MUCH WEIGHT IT'S DRIVING ME CRAZY...
I WOULD LOVE TO BE AT THE OCEAN TODAY. I HAVEN'T BEEN THERE FOR A LONG WHILE DO TO MY PANIC...WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING FOR THIS WEEKEND...??? THE SUN IS PEEPING OUT..MAYBE IT WILL CLEAR UP AND I CAN GO HOME AND DO SOME SANDING..........FOLLOW YOUR HEART.........DO YOU THINK THAT'S ALWAYS A GOOD IDEA??? I'M NOT SO SURE!!! I THINK YOUR HEART CAN GET YOU INTO TROUBLE AT TIMES...
WELL AT ANY RATE, I WILL BE ON MY WAY HOME SHORTLY AND WILL LET YOU KNOW WHAT EVER HAPPENS....I WISH YOU A MOST WONDERFUL WEEKEND FULL OF LOVE ....THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT...HUGS JANICE

7 comments:

  1. I've found myself, I think we all in situations where we cannot decide what is the right thing to do...If you were absoulutely sure you wouldn't have the doubts. Go slowly, and thoughtfully.I would love to go to the beach with you, we could look for shells, or crochet under an umbrella..I havn't been either in a long time...I love being near the sea...or ocean...what's the hurry?

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  2. I'm sorry you're having to deal with a panic disorder. They are very real and also very scary. Do what you feel is best. I agree with Faith. Take things slowly.

    xo
    Claudia

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  3. Hi Janice!
    We are new to each other's blogs today. So happy you found me! Your blog is beautiful! Right up my alley!!!
    I will pray for your panic disorder. I suffer from RA and have anxiety issues at times as well. It is no fun.
    Be Blessed,
    Danette

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  4. Hi Janice! Thanks so much for stopping by and the sweet comment you left. I think you have a whole bunch of gorgeous pictures on your blog including the new ones. Lovely crochet too. That's becoming sort of a lost art. I hope your little time away has helped you de-stress a little and that you're doing better!

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  5. I'm still here thinking of you Janice. Glad you are going to try the nice romantic dinner. You know a way to a mans heart is his tummy. Hope all goes well. xx hugs

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  6. you have so many gorgeous pictures on here, it's really beautiful. Thanks for visiting my blog and the lovely comment. I really appreciate it, Karen

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  7. Take care of yourself Janice, you know what is best for you. A doctor might be able to help you with some meds to get on the other side of the panic; think about it. So much life out there and you will enjoy yourself again; you can overcome this.

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