Cheap Medicine............... ?

I saw this. And I said to myself.. hum Laugh what is that. I don't seem to do much 

of that these days...

Then I thought how can I laugh what about

Seems silly but it's not I really haven't been laughing to much

seems I cry more than anything...

I might smile here and there about pretty things

but truly laugh and be happy about it

no...

Most of my days I feel like this... I don't kno what can make me laugh.. I feel I carry a heavy load

thought it would all go away after Mama died 

but I suppose because there is so much to do I feel over burdened

I have tried hard to leave it in God's hand's but no matter I still have to do certain

things....

Maybe if I wasn't 56 and broken I wouldn't feel that it's so difficult who knows

 I should be excited about Mama's house.. but really in true honesty it seems so far feched...

A big huge dream that I seem to be trying to accomplish all by myself

no one seems to have time to help

so it leaves it all on me...

Daisy's make me smile and feel good inside...

Did I ever tell you that I wanted to be a Ballet Dancer, In high school I danced for almost four years.

I loved it. That made me laugh and smile a lot.. I danced Ballet and Modern Dance.

And I preformed in a lot of places in San Francisco

In our Civic Center and our Museum The  DeYoung Museum.

It was funny because my Father would take me there all the time as a child on 

Sunday's after Church..The DeYoung Museum.

Memories ...

I loved preforming it was exciting and bright...

I won a scholarship for the summer and I remember being so happy

There was this famous Ballet dancer who was then 80 years old

She was teaching us a dance but with huge scarves

It was in a basement in a Church in Union Square of San Francisco

But barely into it my parents made me stop and  go up north to my Aunts house in 

the country which I loved, but, I felt this was more important and I was old enough to make my own decisions

but NOt according to them and they didn't see the importance 

of what I was doing

So sadly I did not get to finish my scholarship program...

Well life is such...

It has been rainning in San Francisco, I thought that I was dreaming last night but, nope

it was and the skies are dark and cloudy this morning...

I think I will spend the day going through Mama's papers she has tons to go through

and maybe do some more going through boxes because I want to prepare

for a small sidewalk sale to see what monies I can make.. 

Plus I have to rid of so much stuff...

So as I sit here drinking my morning Tea

I will be doing just that start in on a pile of paper's

Here's to you, wishing you a Grand day

full Of Love n Laughing

they say it's good

medicine

p.s. I think it to be but just to find that way to laugh is another story...

With Love 

Janice