I saw this. And I said to myself.. hum Laugh what is that. I don't seem to do much
of that these days...
Then I thought how can I laugh what about
Seems silly but it's not I really haven't been laughing to much
seems I cry more than anything...
I might smile here and there about pretty things
but truly laugh and be happy about it
Most of my days I feel like this... I don't kno what can make me laugh.. I feel I carry a heavy load
thought it would all go away after Mama died
but I suppose because there is so much to do I feel over burdened
I have tried hard to leave it in God's hand's but no matter I still have to do certain
Maybe if I wasn't 56 and broken I wouldn't feel that it's so difficult who knows
I should be excited about Mama's house.. but really in true honesty it seems so far feched...
A big huge dream that I seem to be trying to accomplish all by myself
no one seems to have time to help
so it leaves it all on me...
Daisy's make me smile and feel good inside...
Did I ever tell you that I wanted to be a Ballet Dancer, In high school I danced for almost four years.
I loved it. That made me laugh and smile a lot.. I danced Ballet and Modern Dance.
And I preformed in a lot of places in San Francisco
In our Civic Center and our Museum The DeYoung Museum.
It was funny because my Father would take me there all the time as a child on
Sunday's after Church..The DeYoung Museum.
I loved preforming it was exciting and bright...
I won a scholarship for the summer and I remember being so happy
There was this famous Ballet dancer who was then 80 years old
She was teaching us a dance but with huge scarves
It was in a basement in a Church in Union Square of San Francisco
But barely into it my parents made me stop and go up north to my Aunts house in
the country which I loved, but, I felt this was more important and I was old enough to make my own decisions
but NOt according to them and they didn't see the importance
of what I was doing
So sadly I did not get to finish my scholarship program...
Well life is such...
It has been rainning in San Francisco, I thought that I was dreaming last night but, nope
it was and the skies are dark and cloudy this morning...
I think I will spend the day going through Mama's papers she has tons to go through
and maybe do some more going through boxes because I want to prepare
for a small sidewalk sale to see what monies I can make..
Plus I have to rid of so much stuff...
So as I sit here drinking my morning Tea
I will be doing just that start in on a pile of paper's
Here's to you, wishing you a Grand day
full Of Love n Laughing
they say it's good
p.s. I think it to be but just to find that way to laugh is another story...